Perhaps you might know an exorcist that could help me out?

I need a break. Seriously, I am here waving the white flag, throwing in the towel or what have you, I give up! He won. The fat lady sang a beautiful song - I am a terrible mother.

I just want to know what happened to my sweet little boy. The one who cried because someone at school called him a baby. This same child is now not listening to a word I say to him, kicking, punching and screamed and yelled at 11pm because I wouldn't get him a chicken burger. A friggin CHICKEN BURGER? For realz dude?

I personally think screaming for a chicken burger is a sign of the devil, but apparently these are the things I do wrong (according to grandma #1 and #2)
- He is acting out because you buy him too many toys
- He screams at the top of his lungs over a chicken burger because you have to be more firm with him.
- He defies everything you say because you didn't buy him a puppy.
- He leaves his dirty underwear laying around because he doesn't have a man in his life to yell at him.
- He gives you a hard time every morning because you don't spend enough time with him.
- He kicks you because you didn't do the safety pin trick where you poke the kids with a pin when they are bad.

Unless it involves holy water and a priest, I think I'll stick to modern times and yell and scream back at him until he is embarrassed...and while I'm at it, maybe I'll embarrass him in front of his little friends. Who am I kidding? Nothing works, my child is broken!

And this, my friends, is one of the downfalls of being a "single parent" (I hate that term so much!). I am always the bad guy - always! In fact, I'm working on developing an evil laugh and evil person costume. Now I just need an evil name....